The Awesome...The Bad....and The Good

Collin pooped! Yaaaaay! He pooped and pooped good. It was the most awesome thing ever. He was so thrilled with each and every little push that he had to get up and peek at the results. Yep, it was pretty spectacular. I stopped short of photographing that momentous occasion. I did, however, take pictures of the reward, which was watching, "Muteets!" That's Collin-speak for "Muppets." I wish I could capture how cute it is for him to raise his little fists in the air and command that "Mama dance" to the "Muteets," because you know there just ain't nothin' cuter.


Hooray! It's the "Muteets!" Collin loves to watch Kermit, the "foggy!" The kid's seen it, like twice, yet he remembers it. Weird.

Alas, that was the end of awesome for the next three days. Yep, the end. Finito. Because we'd spent days doing nothing but encouraging our little man, he kind of got a lot, scratch that, nothing BUT leeway, he started figuring out that he could get away with murder. Suddenly, he decided that while he COULD make it to the bathroom, he no longer wanted to; and while he COULD follow rules, he no longer wanted to do that either.

By the end of three days of him looking at me, peeing his pants and then laughing about it; and then climbing on furniture, generally ignoring me, throwing things at me, hitting me and then laughing at me again, I decided I'd either have to finally follow through with my threat to sell him to gypsies or join a band of them myself. I'd lost all my parental power; let alone the potty training. Who even cared about that anymore!

This may look innocent...but it's really Collin on his way to do me some sort of bodily harm.

We gave him a few inches to support him in the potty power and he took miles and miles and used potty to beat the living snot out of me while Daddy was at work. Truthfully, the potty accidents didn't mean squat to me; it was the behavior that had to go! Potty was an experiment that we tried that worked with dire consequences. We went in saying we knew it was early to try, so if it didn't work, whatever. When it did, wahoo!

A very brief, by happy moment. I enjoyed these moments greatly over the last few days and tried very hard to make them last by staring at the picture of it while he shrieked at me and pretending that's what was real instead.

I had no idea he'd be so stubborn and use it to manipulate it into something else and completely change his behavior. Diapers back on and we'll try again later. No pressure and back to the sweet kid in time out until he remembers who's boss...which was pretty quickly, by the way. So, all those who want to say "told you so," please refrain. The last week of h-e-double hockey sticks have been enough for me. We just have to figure out how to work around Collin's, "I will CHOOSE when to do it myself" attitude, now that we know and he knows when/how/what to do, which is totally annoying.

Thankfully, Daddy had the day off today to help me recover from the torture behavior that Collin inflicted on me all week. He came home yesterday to find me pretty much quivering in the corner with our formerly sweet boy beating me to a pulp. Well, not really, but kind of.

Anyway, in better news we had our allergy appointment today. No milk allergy. Definite amoxicillin allergy. The prognosis is that because his antibiotic reaction was so strong, he was in a histamine overload and his body was continuing to fire off hives for sometime afterward causing him to react to almost any stimuli in his environment, even if he wasn't allergic to it. She told us that his skin is especially reactive to outside reactors, like if you scratch him, the mark stays for an excessively long time. He gets that from me. Sorry Collin, didn't mean to give you freak skin. But, the good news is that he gets to have his milk and stuff again. Wheeeeee! Collin's pleased about that!

P.S. Oh yeah, the minute that diaper hit his rear, we (I) YANKED that pacifier from that kid so fast it would make your head spin! Sure, he has it for bedtime still and sure, he's whining like you wouldn't believe for it. But, no stinking way does he get it now. No siree!

Choices...One of THOSE Days

Today, I made a choice; or rather, I'm making a choice. I'm choosing to remember the Collin of yesteryear. I'm choosing to remember the adorable, itsy-bitsy-teeny-weeny Collin that snuggled me and wanted not only to be within centimeters of me, but also to be snuggling me. I'm choosing this because, if I don't, I may actually smash his face into the couch. So, this is how I choose to see Collin today. There are no pictures of him "today" because I spent every minute so far either, not strangling him or briefly enjoying him. It's been a bit manic over here.

He had his first accident today. Not a big deal. Kids do that and it happened on the way to the potty, so I wasn't too bummed about it. I think he's a little scared of the poopie part of all this, and he's got to go, so he is a little nervous about going all together now. Anyway, it was a setback and it kind of sucked. Alas, bum out number 1 for the day. He was "sorry! sorry! sorry!" He knew he did wrong, so it was comforting. He even sang his, "no more diapers," song.

But, as I hopped in the shower, he tried to play peek-a-boo, like always. I told him to just go read stories because I felt a little sad about wet pants and wasn't in the mood. Who knew he'd do it! When I got out of the shower, lo and behold, he's quietly on the couch, flipping through his stories. Awwwww. I called out looking for him and it was pretty sweet to hear him yell, "reading, mama!" when I asked where he was, and even more sweet to actually see his little body on the big couch with books strewn all around him.

So, we read stories together for the next forty minutes or so, snuggling. It was not all together unpleasant, I must say. He insisted that when we got to the picture of the "peanut car," in one of his books, that I hug him and call him "my peanut." How cute is that? Of course, we kept talking about potty and that he should be going in the potty, blah, blah, blah.

Then, we went and played outside in the playroom. Then, on our next emergency trip to the potty, he leaned over and smashed one of my breakables in the bathroom. He knows it's a no touch and in his long life, he has NEVER broken a thing in our house. He's very good at not touching things he's not supposed to touch. But, he was just screwing around in there, aggravating me because he's afraid to push and wham, slammed a sand-filled vase of shells off a shelf and onto the floor. I lost it. I cried. The frustration of the day got to me. Did I mention he's got a snot cold too?

"Mama sad," he repeated over and over again. He hugged me. He kissed me. He repeated that the "shell broke," over and over too. Nothing really helped. You know what would've helped? If he would've dropped a nice dookie in the potty. Alas, that didn't happen, but he did pee. That's nice. Oh, and we've established that if I tell him to push, he just presses his fingers into his penis and "pushes," it in, like reversing a turtleneck. Not exactly the right idea.

Anyway, it's been a stressful day. I know an accident here and there is to be expected, but couple it with the impending poop that could pop at any moment and throw my smashed wedding favor on top of that, and you know what, I'm gonna cry...a lot. And, "mama sad," doesn't fix it, especially with 2-second toddler hugs. So, I have to, while he's sleeping, pretend that he's still my precious little, immobile, non-back talking infant who dotes on me. I know it's awesome to have a kid that thinks the sun rises and sets with you, but it's also pretty great to have one that will curl up on you when you just need some lovin' from him, like now.

I am focusing, right now, on the positives, which are:

Two accidents in four days isn't much

He woke up dry again this morning

He is sorry

We're still positive and upbeat about this (around Collin!)

He's proud when he makes it and is dry

He was sad when Mommy was sad, and wanted to fix it...very sweet

He's the best kid ever

Snot is less gross than puke

3-Day Potty Training: The Aftermath

Number of Successful pee-pees today/with announcement: 2

Number of Big Boy Underwear Collin Wet today: 0

Number of Dry Wake-Ups today: 1

Number of Happy Parents: 2

Number of Proud of Himself Kiddos: 1

Number (total of Pee Accidents/including bed-wetting): 5

Number (total Poop Accidents) : 1 (ish...happened on the way to the potty)

Number of Dollars spent on rewards/potties/underwear/book: approx $300...WORTH IT!!!!

We went through an extra pair of big boy underpants this morning, but it wasn't Collin's fault; there was no accident. He sat too far forward on his chair when he went potty and peed all over them. So, I count that not as a potty accident, but as a potty casualty. So, yes, he told me he had to go potty and yes, we made it with ample time, and yes, we are still accident-free! Hooray!

He woke up dry this morning. We found the trick is to visit his room an hour after he's gone to sleep to encourage him to empty his bladder, especially since he refuses to go before bed. Then, we pop in every time he wakes up, even if he's just groggy, just to reinforce the keeping dry message. We ask him if he has to go or if he is still dry. He figured out really quickly that he does NOT want to get pulled out of bed to go potty at 2 am, and he also does NOT want a wet bed that necessitates getting pulled out to be changed, so he'd better hold it. We also pull him out at about 5 to pee, so he makes it to 8. Collin got his last "pee-pee" reward for being dry this morning.

I say "we," when of course, I really mean my super-husband, Bryon. I feel the teensy-weensiest bit guilty about him getting up at night; but then I realize that I'm pulling the day shift of all the potty stuff, and it's not like I get relief when he gets home. Collin treats Bryon like a molesting priest if he approaches him in the bathroom. If I'm not around though, like say, sleeping soundly in our room, all is fine and Dada's a-okay, so no worries. Mom's understand this problem; if she's within sight, she's the wanted one: out of sight though, Dada's a just fine substitute...although, he says that not being needed when I'm around has made him feel like a "Dunse" (his spelling, not mine).

He's been dry all day and made it known that he's had to go twice. Wahoo! Two successful trips to the potty! He has dropped the pacifier habit too. I asked him to put it away as soon as he got up this morning and he marched right over to the drawer and spit it in. So awesome. He hasn't asked for it all day, save for one mild grumbling at his first pee-pee. That's it. Phew. We'll see what happens come poo-poo time. He's even been doing his hair, a good compliment to the first day back in pants.

Yesterday's nap involved our last full-fledged accident, which he was terribly upset by and I don't think he's in any mood to repeat. He was terrifed at seeing his pee beneath his feet. And, in the process of all that fear, he made a push on the way to the potty that resulted in a poop that tumbled out on the floor before we made it to the potty, then one in the potty. But, I think that will be our last poop out of the potty since last night he pooped RIGHT IN THE POTTY!...pushing and all. It was very small but the pride level at that raisin was so large it filled up the empty potty space and then some, probably the whole room, heck the whole house. There wasn't even enough room for Mama's pride.

Look...a slightly less "proud" moment for Mama...a not so wise decision on Collin's part. An even less wise decision? When he decided the next step was to actually mount the top of the toolbench.

Overall, I think it's safe (eek!) to say without reservation, we're pee-pee trained with 99% accuracy, we're maybe poop trained (remains to be seen?) and we're sleep pee-pee trained with 80% accuracy. That's not bad for 3-days and for a kid who's officially 22-months old today. I count this as a success and if you can find a mom who's prouder of her kid today, let me know.

If anyone's interested in this program, please let me know. No, I'm not getting a kickback, but I'd love to share. I was very skeptical, but it worked. It was very, very, very hard. Harder than I believed. I was sure that my kid would be the exception because, surely he is exceptional, smart and amazing. I thought he'd be one of the ones who catches on in one day. I read the testimonials of people who had to lock themselves in the bathroom to cry or bang their heads on the wall (yeah, I did that too!) and didn't believe it would happen. I read the stories of people who ran outside to scream at the top of their lungs so they wouldn't swear at thier kids (didn't to that, but was tempted). But, it worked and I'm glad to have spent 3-days instead of weeks, months or years. It's three days of torture; grueling, horrible torture. But, the upshot is twofold: you get to spend 3-days really getting to hang with your kid on his terms, and he is potty trained. Done!

Watching Potty Power with renewed perspective!

P.S. Wish me luck when we go out of the house for the first time today for speech therapy. We skipped the park today because I thought one outing was enough for the first day after "graduation."

3-Day Potty Training: Day 3 Noontime Totals

Big Boy Underwear in wash at naptime: 0!!!! :)

Anything else in the wash at naptime: 0!!!! :)

Successful trips to the potty last night/evening: 3

Successful trips to the potty overnight: 3

Successful trips to the potty for poop: 1

Accidents: 2 (note that's total for the whole time too!!! hooray!)

Successful trips to the potty today (dribble-free!!! and with announcement!!!): 2

Sheets in the wash this morning: 1

Baths Needed: 1

Enjoy my random pictures of this process. He's just so darn cute. He keeps singing, or trying to sing, "No more diapers for me" from his Potty Power DVD! There'll probably be more, as my guess is that this is more of a four to five day process for it to be "permanent" but the gist is stuck at three days. He seems to have it right now, but you definitely will have to STICK with it for it to work.

After yesterday afternoon, I was tempted to throw in the towel. We had some progress in the morning, and a bit of progress into the afternoon, and then a nuclear meltdown in the hours preceding dinner. Yep, a total and complete reversal of everything that precluded it.

He peed his pants totally. No dribbles and then off to the potty. No announcements. Nothing. Then, ten minutes later, he did it again during the first full-blown tantrum he'd had during this whole process. It was horrible. Something had to be done.

We went where I vowed I'd never go again. Pacifier-land. 180-turnaround. Within an hour, Collin announced "pee-pee" and marched HIMSELF to the potty and waited for me to pull down his pants for him where he promptly peed. This same, accident-free, dribble-free pee repeated itself three times before bath time. And, he made it to the potty for a big poop too (barely, but still!). So, pacifier is staying until we make it over this hump. We've broken it once, we can brake it again. If that's what it takes to learn this scary process for him, I'm okay with it.

After the big poop in the potty, we broke down and gave him the grand poobah of rewards that we were saving. The super garbage truck. It's one of those Tonka jobbies that's like $30. I thought Bryon might need a refresher in potty training when he realized all the stuff it did because he almost peed his pants too when it came out of the package and he actually got to play with it. It actually compacts garbage and lifts the can to the back. It IS pretty cool, and Collin was actually SHAKING with excitement when he got, what he calls, his "poo-poo present," from, yes, "Santa." No, we can seem to dissuade him from that idea. We're trying.

Overnight, he went potty in the potty three times for Daddy. We're supposed to cut off liquids 2-3 hours before bed but Collin literally BEGS for water. We've tried hiding all cups so he can't even see they exist but he still begs. The kid is sweating and out of breath from playing so hard. I don't think it's a comfort thing; I think he's genuinely thirsty. I keep filling them only tiny bits full, thinking he'll only take what he needs; but, he keeps downing them. Normally, he'll drink 2-3 full sippy cups between dinner and bed. We got him down to about 1 last night, and that's still a lot.

I missed the mark this morning though and he wet the bed right at get-up time. I dashed in when he first started stirring and by the time I got there, he'd peed on himself....and rolled over into it. Gross. It was in his hair, all over his arms and legs. It was disgusting. He had to have a bath. I'm beginning to wonder if he even woke up for it because he didn't just dribble and then stop; it was a full-fledged wetting.

Anyway, today he's refusing to drink anything, I think because he's not feeling well. Stupid cold that decided to come on right in the middle of this! Despite that, he's had to pee twice before I put him down and both times, he told me he had to go and we went to the bathroom together where he emptied his bladder in one go! Hooray! And, he answers me when I ask him incessantly if he's still dry and what he's supposed to say when he has to go potty. And, we landed on a treat that tickles his fancy for these constant naggings: Trix! I popped one and I can't imagine why anyone would enjoy them. They taste like sugar balls, held together with food dye and sawdust. He thinks they are crack.

His second pee was a bit of an adventure because for the first time since we started all this, our awesome potty with the shield wall the height of the Great Wall of China failed us. His mini-Collin was poking a little high and he peed all over the floor. It was pretty gross; especially since the instant he's done, he wants to stand up. So, yeah, he stepped all over it. Ewww. Oh god! I just realized that in the multitude of things to do when he's done peeing, like wiping up the pee, giving him a sticker, a Trix, dumping the pee, wiping the seat out, putting his pants on, washing his hands, drying his feet, etc, I forgot to actually WASH his feet before I put him in bed. AAAAH! Oh well. Sterile, right? No. That is gross. I'll figure something out.

Anyway, I'm counting this as overall success and growing as we go. This is not easy but today has gotten progressively easier. Wish us luck as we keep trying! And, tomorrow is a big day, and a true test, as eventually, we'll have to leave the house...eeeek!

3-Day Potty Training: Day 2 Noontime Totals

Number of Big Boy Underwear in the wash while Collin Naps: 5 (big improvement, eh?!!) Number of Big Boy Underwear in the wash last night post Nap: 8

Number of sheets we had to wash AFTER nap yesterday: 0!!!!

Number of sheets/pads we had to wash AFTER bed last night: 2

Number of PJs washed in the morning: 2

Number of successful pee-pees today*: 3 Scratch that 4

Number of successful poops today: 2

Number of full-fledged accidents: 0

Number of parents ready for the looney bin: 1 (yeah, Daddy's remaining calm, probably because he gets to go to work tomorrow and leave me alone with this for the day...jerk)

*Pee-pee is anytime he gets pee in the potty

**Poop is anytime the poop makes it in the potty, even if he "starts" it somewhere else, like in the corner, staring us right in the eye :)

Yep, we're struggling through this whole ordeal. The big success is that yesterday, Collin was "dribbling" a lot before realizing he was wet and either saying "wet," "potty," or "pee pee," and stopping or rushing to the potty to finish. In fact, most of the dribbles were big enough to soak through to run onto the floor. Today, he's barely squirting enough to wet through the front of his underpants and then stopping, looking at us in panic, like ACK! help! and then rushing with us to the potty to finish the business at hand. The dribbles are getting smaller and smaller, so he's getting better and better at holding it and then knowing what to do about it.

The non-silver lining is that I, obviously, want him to tell me he's got to go BEFORE the dribble, so we can make it. We know he's got to go, he knows he's got to go. We try taking him a bunch of times before the dribble, but nada, zilch, nothing. Half the time, he'll admit to having to go, some of the time, he'll kind be a party to a walk to the bathroom, and then the other part of the time, he sees the bathroom and runs the other way. So, no pee in the potty yet without the dribble first; which is bumming me out more than it should. I'm trying to see the glass as half full right now.

We just put him down for his nap and the first thing he did was start pushing out a dookie as soon as we closed the door. We caught him in time and we made it to the potty before it poked it's way fully out in the pants. But, I'm a little bummed that he didn't tell us he had to go. I'm not sure he understands that we can hear him over the baby monitor. He says "monor" for monitor, so he gets that something communicates with us, but that's a big concept.

I started him a "progress" chart last night that I was certain he'd never understand; but I thought, hey, what the heck, let's try it out. I put a little grid on it and decorated some squares as "special." They look like total crap. But, he's too little to know that. Anyway, every time he visits the bathroom, even at all, even if nothing happens, he gets a sticker on a square. He helps put it on. When he reaches a special square, he gets one of the presents/rewards we stocked up on (and restocked up on last night after he went to bed...thank goodness Target is open until ten on Saturday night!!). He is so totally into this chart! I swear, "tiker! tiker!" is more important than actually going potty, I think. And yes, he totally gets the "special" square thing. He gets to one of those and his little feet stomp and that smile is as wide as you can imagine.

Anyway, this program is definitely not for the faint of heart. It brought me to tears today. I had to sequester myself off in my bathroom for a minute to compose myself so I didn't slam his little toosh onto the potty seat, or worse. Yeah, I just had to let it all out. 24-7 of positive reinforcement, careful to never say a negative word when they are simply just peeing on the floor, in their bed, on your carpet, and then popping up out of the crib six times before nap insisting that yes, they do have to pee only to sit on the potty seat to do NOTHING can break a Mommy. It can, trust me. Especially when during those six visits to the potty seat, they only sit for twelve seconds at a time, then insist that NO, they are NOT done. Yep, it can break you. Oh yeah, especially when you know, pretty surely that as soon as they do fall asleep they are probably going to pee in the bed.

P.S. On a happy update, while I waited for pictures to upload, I went and checked on the little man in question, who was groggily trying to finally fall asleep and told him it was time to go pee pee. He decided not to protest. HOORAY!!! He peed! And, I mean, really, really peed. Emptied that bladder. So, phew. I imagine we'll have another sheet-change free nap...except for the piddle that came with the poop pushing earlier, of course I'll have to wash those. I'm not counting those. I'm only counting this success. You've got to take them where you get them.

All I can say is that we are committed to giving it our all before we throw in the towel and because he's certainly made progress since yesterday, we can only see that as a good sign. We'll see what the afternoon holds and tomorrow before we reassess. We've already figured out some things that work and don't; like Collin hates clapping and yelling for success. It freaks him out. Subdued and lowkey is more his style. It's all a work in progress.

3-Day Potty Training: Day 1 Noontime Totals

Pairs of big boy underwear in the wash while Collin naps: 9

Pairs of big boy underwear on the boy while he naps: 1

Number of Collin's Shirts in the wash while he naps: 2

Pairs of Mommy's pants in the wash while Collin naps: 3

Pairs of Daddy's pants in the wash while Daddy naps: 0 (what the heck!?)

Number of successful pee trips to the potty*: 3

Number of successful poo-poo trips to the potty:0(no poops in the pants yet either, so phew!)

Number of accidental poo-poo trips to the potty**: 1

Number of Laundry Fairies working today: 1

*We count a successful trip to the potty as being him telling us, in any way, that he needs to go, making it there still dry, and doing something, ANYTHING, in the potty chair, even if it's just a dribble.

**The first visit to the potty chair this morning resulted in a poop. What? It freaked him out a little, I think. We were shocked too. It was very tiny but nonetheless, a big success. It was a bit of a surprise to everyone as no one even knew he had to poop or saw him push. But, hooray for Collin and the surprise, accidental poop!

Yep, we're marking the halfway point of day one and it's been a doozie. No one said it'd be easy, and it hasn't; but, I'm super-duper proud of my little man. And, that's what he's shaping up to be. Enjoy my random pictures of the day so far, including what I think is quite possibly, the cutest toosh to ever, EVER fill the Thomas underpants! (P.S. that's a string hanging down, not pee!)

After some fun opening our underwear and throwing out the remainder of our diapers (thankfully, we only had five left!) and our genie this morning, we put on the big boy underwear. Collin thought it was a great hoot to throw out the stuff. I think he was a little overwhelmed by the whole thing and was more interested in continuing to throw out stuff than put on underwear. And, the fact that he got to drink juice all day is throwing him for an equal loop. Since the goal is to keep him peeing nonstop to give him every opportunity to make it to the potty chair as many times as possible, we wanted him to drink, drink, drink, drink. Alas, juice. So, he thinks it's Mardi Gras in our house today, despite the fact that this juice probably tastes like crap because I watered it down so much.

Anyway, about an hour into our little experiment, he freaked and got suddenly scared of his potty chair. Fear not, little one! We busted out the new froggy chair and some hugs and all was well again, slowly but surely. Apparently, froggy likes pee-pee in his belly and Collin likes if you turn the potty chair with his back to you so he can lean into you and be hugged when he goes. So sweet! Oh, and he kind of likes music in the bathroom. So, from there, we've had relative success. He even knew he was having an "accident" when he started to wet during lunch and he announced it. Good on him. Only four hours into the program and that's the second time he announced his wetness before he finished. He held the rest and finished in the potty chair. HOORAY!

Anyway, we are almost out of potty rewards and we thought we were totally stocked up. Alas, I'm going out after he goes to bed tonight to get more. It's hard not to reward him when he keeps going in the potty! And, we had to give him lots of treats at first to get him over the "freaked out" hump, which seemed to work. Now that he's chilled, he seems to like dumping his own pee into the big toilet and washing his hands when he's done. Wish us luck for the dry nap!

I'm a little bummed because one of the things we were supposed to do was look for Collin's "tell;" the sign that he was about to go, and grab him before he started going to put him on the potty. Well, he doesn't have one. He doesn't even stop playing, make a face, look distant, nothing. He just pees, right there on the carpet. The only thing I notice is that he seems to prefer standing. Anyway, thankfully he seems to now tell us a few seconds before he has to go and the last handful of times, he's held it until we got to the chair. He's either said, "pee-pee," "poo-poo," or "potty." So, despite his lack of a tell, at least he's "telling" us! Oh yeah, and he's gotten so many jelly beans for sitting on the potty, he's pretty much become Pavlov's dog...when he's sixty, he'll still be salivating when he's peeing.

On the Eve of Greatness

Collin gave me some great hope tonight. On what I thought was an ominous beginning to our potty training saga tomorrow morning because Daddy called and said his flight had been cancelled, thus making me the solo participant in our start, I was saved by my boy. Well, and Daddy too because he finagled his way to another airport and another flight, which is also currently delayed; so, we'll see if he gets here at all.

But, Collin reversed the bad juju vibes. Out of thin air he produced his first unprompted, "I love you." That's right folks an unsolicited, unforced, "I love you," straight from the kid. And, you know what's even better than that? He gave it to me while he was, get this, helping me with the laundry! Do I have a great kid, or do I have a great kid? No tradesies, he's mine. My precious little baby boy.

Then, to top things off, when I laid him down in his crib and we were having a little nightie-night chat about our big day tomorrow and whether or not he might be ready to be a big kid, and how Daddy might have talked to Santa (hey we're playing the present angle...he won't remember this anyway, so what if we're mixing messages!) about bringing him big kid underwear back from his trip, he started to sing a song from his potty power video called, "No more diapers for me!" Not only does this knock my socks off because it's the first time he's EVER sang a song but he actually strung five, yes FIVE words together.

It sounded like: "No mr ditrs fr me," but I got the gist and that's what's important, right? And, he knew what he meant. Considering it was unprompted from me and he came up with the idea and the connection to what we were talking about, I'm impressed. I'm just so proud of him. Look out potty chair, we're coming right at you tomorrow! He's ready to be a BIG KID!

Ha-PEEE Day!

I'm not sure if it was the "big date" that brought on Collin's serious desire to go pee-pee in the potty, or if he was just tickled pink over the new hutch top that got delivered yesterday....

Yeah, I know it's thrilling. It's pretty, huh? I was so excited, I peed a little. I'm socking away the money for the matching corner china cabinet now. Don't ask me where we'll put it; but I want it. The only problem with the hutch is that there are so many shelves, I couldn't decide WHAT to put on them. We have enough stuff, but I couldn't decide how to arrange it! I was so overwhelmed with choices that I finally gave up until Bryon came home.

Anyway, I digress. When we got home from the mowie date, I had to pee because it's no fun to pee in public with Collin, as he likes to either peek under the stalls or touch everything in there. Alas, I held it until I got home. He was so enthused by my peeing, he desperately began pulling at his pants and begging to go pee-pee too! I ignored him. Shame on Mommy! I was in a hurry to take the dog for a desperately needed walk before it got dark, and we're ARE starting this 3-day potty odyssey on Saturday.

Well, he was pretty determined to make pee-pee in that potty yesterday. So, before bath time, he insisted that he had to go potty before I plunked him in the tub and sure enough, he plopped his little butt on the potty and without me even warning him to point that little "peesis" (which is what he calls his mini-Collin) down, he peed in the potty! Witness below...yes, I took pictures of it. I had to! Daddy wasn't here to see it! Can you really, really blame me? (splash guards are pretty ineffective, eh?)

Anyway, he got a present for it from the pee-pee Santa...which is what he called it. Yeah, I broke into the 3-day reward stash. When I jumped up and down and clapped and screamed for him, he looked at me like I was a lunatic, as if to tell me, "Mom, what's the big deal? Aren't I SUPPOSED to pee in this potty thing?" It was pretty anti-climactic, actually. But, the idea seemed to stick today, at least about the present. When he saw the horsey that he opened today, he called it pee-pee present and Santa horse. So, fingers crossed, the idea is settling in there.

P.S. He LOVED "Hotel for Dogs." He sat the whole time, quiet as a little church mouse and snuggled on my lap for a good portion of the movie, which I didn't mind one bit. So, a good snuggle movie and a pee in the potty; I can live with that for a day!

Giving our Relationship Another Go

So, Daddy's gone all week....again! And, Collin and I are trying this whole "dating" business again this afternoon. Mostly, it's because it's Thursday and napping is just out the window on Thursday anyway. The garbage man comes on Thursday and Collin is just so wound up about that idea because to him, that guy might as well be Jon Bon Jovi to an acid washed-wearing me in 1985.

Anyway, I told him if he would just try, try, try to sleep for at least an hour, I'd wake him up and we'd go see a mowie (yep, you read that right...we've apparently banned "v's" in this house according to Collin) about puppies (are there any other kind since Bolt?) when he woke up. So, since the garbage man/rock star made his round and I dragged him out of bed once already to see it, he's gone down quietly, a first on a Thursday in this house. I almost feel like I shouldn't go wake him up in a few minutes to get him ready for our mowie. But, I've been promising the kid a date all day, and I hate to renege on promises.

To start the day of lovieness off right, I put him in a totally adorable, but beat-up-worthy shirt that his Daddy will kill me for when he sees it. I told him about it when he called last night, but I'm pretty sure that he didn't quite grasp just how gay it is. Collin's only unhappy because you guys can't read it. It says, "Mom's Little Sweet Heart." I don't care. It looks awesome on him and he pulls it off. He's a man, right? Real men can wear anything. Oh, and don't worry, I bought another, slightly less gay, Valentine's shirt too. So, he's got an equally cute shirt coming up too. Just you wait!

And, I made him a special "happy" breakfast. Collin totally got it too! He called his eggs "hair" and he combed it with his fingers before he ate it. I know, I'm like freaking Martha Stewart sometimes. Really, I just felt bad that he couldn't have his circle-shaped cheese for breakfast anymore, so I made him circle bananas and they just looked pathetic in a pile.
Mmmmmm....hairy eggs!

To thank me, he gave me my favorite face: the ham-n-cheese smile. No allergy to that dairy product for me! Groan, I know that's a terrible joke. Don't ask me why this is my favorite face of his...it's just funny. Squinty eyes, smushy cheecks and all---I just LOOOOOOVE IT!
Then, to show me just how much he appreciates all that I do for him and all that I'm going through to make our day special, he decided that despite Kari's full lap today, what with Grace and baby Ben (yep, that's his pitiful little arm you see poking out there), he refused to let me read him a story and would only consent to stories being read by her. Apparently, he was just sick of my voice. Whatever, a few minutes later, she was old news and I had all the kids (minus Ben who's immobile and can't express his choice by movement) on my lap for stories. They are so fickle, these toddlers!
Anyway, off to the movies! And, can I just say, that despite my complete and total lack of desire to see Hotel for Dogs, I'm totally excited to go! I can't wait to take him!

P.S. just to freak out the Grandparents, who don't see the daredevil in action every day, Collin wanted to tell you...look what I can do!!!

Look, no net! Well, really, no Mommy holding me. He does this all the time, and has been since we moved here, so really months and months and months now, but Mommy just never really took good pictures of it before.

Mama Be Hatin'

I'm going to go out on a limb here and say it: my kid's weird. Okay, not all the time, but a good deal of the time lately. He's getting these "ideas" in his head and once they are there, they really stick and he can't get them out.

Take the new blankie obsession. It HAS to be wrapped around his waist towel-style and tied in the back so he simply cannot walk. I thought it was a one-time dealio when he had that tantrum night. Nope, it's an all the time thing now. He looks like a complete and total dorkus; but, he's tickled pink whenever I do it.

I've taken to trying to enforce the "no blankie out of the crib" rule, but since he can reach into the crib and snatch it through the bars, I'm pretty much at a loss to prevent it's eminent appearance anywhere from the dinner table to the viewing stands outside the shower, which he inhabits every morning. I at least try not to acquiesce to every single demand for "bankie up!" when he raises his hands and wants it on.

And, he's also taken to a weird game that I do admit to starting: pretending that he's the dog while in the bathtub. He puts the toys in his mouth and shakes his head wildly from side to side and grrrrrrrrrowls. But, nowadays the game's just not fun unless Mommy puts her teeth on the other side of the toy and we play tug of war.

If that wasn't enough of a weird-kiddo for you, the other night, he insisted on "helping" us put his toys away at the end of bath time via mouth. Seriously. Weird.

And, the ultimate weird....he's got cooties. That's what I've decided to call the leprosy/bug bites/hive thingies. So, he's been off antibiotics for weeks and weeks and he's still getting hives. Bryon and I have been up at dawn repeatedly with a flashlight to check for bed bugs (okay Bryon's been up to check for them at my demand and I've rolled over upon his return to say: "mmmftfhlsal bugs? fmalalh zzzzzzz." The ultimate result is no bugs and we think he's allergic to milk.

We came to the conclusion shortly after a meal during which the kid became so filthy we stripped him down to his skivvies and about ten minutes after finishing he broke out like nobody's business. Ping, ping, ping, spots appeared like a freak dot-to-dot, popping up first on his face, then chest, then back, then arms and legs. It was like watching a Polaroid develop. So, whatever it is, it was something he just ate. We narrowed it down to milk/dairy. So, he's had no/limited milk/dairy for the last four days and the spots are receding if not completely gone. Every time he has the slightest bit of dairy, there's a spot breakout. Grrrrrr.

"Look, Ma! No hives! But, I am pretty interested in planting this "A" on my chest. What do you mean it 'means' something to have a scarlet letter on your chest?"

Apparently, he gets this cootie freakiness from his Daddy...what, you expect an imperfection from moi? Of course not. Daddy had a milk allergy from about age two to about age seven as reported from Granny (I think I got that age right). Anyway, we are fighting with the insurance and the specialist to get an appointment squared away to figure out the extent of the allergy and to figure out if he should be avoiding anything else or living in a bubble and whether Mommy can stop checking him three times a night to make sure he's still breathing should he have accidentally encountered too much of a milk ingredient in something she didn't realize contained milk.

Yes, I'm just THAT paranoid. Shut up! Would it be weird to ask him to call me like three times a night while he's away at college, just to know he's all right?

In Collin's great milk-void, he's taken to drinking soap/pee water from the tub. He finds it refreshing and invigorating after a long day. It hits the spot quite nicely.

P.S. Collin's not such a fan of this no more dairy thing. All of his favorite things are dairy: "circo cheese" (aka baby belle circle cheese), "yogi" (aka yogurt), of course milk!, and cheese of any kind and don't get me started on ice cream (which we don't have much but if he finds out that he can't have it, boy I don't want to be there for that conversation!)

AAAAAAAH! No more ice cream! Kidding. this is Collin painting his Christmas ornament. Yeah, yeah, I know it's January. We were busy.