Yummy, Yummy, Yummy I've Got Collin in My Tummy

Damien Dagger Teeth, you've got serious problems. No kidding. Serious. Problems. I can't spell it out more clearly than that. Today is the third time he tried to bite my child. And no, I don't think it's because I dipped him in tasty, tasty chocolate before we got to the park or because I taught him kung-fu and he kicked that little teeth-kid in the jugular. It's because the kid is a nut-bag.

I takes a lot for me to call another kid names. A lot. Kids are great. Kids are all cute, they are all sweet and wonderful and full of life and joy. But this one is a nut-bag. I'm sure that in six months he's going to be wonderful and sweet too and you know what? He's really cute, even now. But for the present, he's bonkers. And, maybe it's just my tasty-treat kid that makes him that way.

I just wish I knew why. I swear I'm not the mom who can't see the wrong her child is doing by bashing another kid in the head with a steam shovel toy or that he probably shouldn't be shoveling sand into another kid's mouth. In all truthfulness, Damien is literally taking running charges at a stationary, usually oblivious Collin and attempting a chomp-down.

Like today, Collin was gazing in amazement at a spider on a bush. He was totally alone, not a care in the world when Damien, like a jungle cat, actually charged THROUGH the bushes to attack. It was like freaking National Geographic. I swear I heard bongo drums or something. Thankfully, Damien's mother has become like his shadow and practically leaped over the bushes to protect my son and I ran around the bushes to get at him from the other side, and thus, no blood was shed. But, I saw those dagger teeth and that open mouth. We pretended it was a harmless incident and she said, not for the first time that day, "Not so close to Collin." And, we both laughed uncomfortably.

I watched him today, and noticed that he didn't seem to take lunges at other kids. It seems to be my child that inspires the biting fits. While he got close and in the face of other kids, it's my son that inspires the most attempts at chomps. What's the deal? Although, when he's not at the park, every mom there has asked, at one time or another, has your kid been bitten by "that boy" because mine has? Still, in a crowd, he seems to glom onto Collin like he's got radar.

This is for Damien....Lunch equals food, not Collin.