Thursday, November 20, 2008

We're (Developmental) Checklist Ready Now

When Collin turned one, we had the typical one-year well baby visit. This appointment was preceded by an envelope that arrived in the mail about a month prior to his appointment that weighed about as much as he did at the time, which was no small bananas. This envelope contained a developmental milestone survey that needed to be completed prior to his appointment.

This darn thing caused me no end of grief, tears and stress. I was sure that my son was most probably going to be scored as a babbling baboon or they'd take him away from me because I wasn't encouraging him to put two items into a container and remove only one. Or, maybe I was a bad parent because while he excelled at his pincer grasp, he couldn't babble two consonants together while clapping in rhythm. Arrrgh!

I filled the darn thing out in pencil half a dozen times, rigging his score this way and that and then redoing it so he'd be in different categories. Mostly, I was just trying to see if he came out normal, over and over and over again. Of course, he did. The darn, sometimes/never/always answers were so vague! I mean, I was pretty sure that once I saw him throw a ball...but was it on purpose? Could I say it was and would that be a lie? Would this survey be part of his "permanent record?"

But, here's the thing with Collin...he does all the things on stupid surveys...when he feels like it. I clearly remember one of the questions being: can he stack items? Well, he had never stacked any of his toys. For weeks leading up to that darn appointment, I'd tried to get him to stack his stacking blocks, his toys, his anything. Nope. Nada. No stacking. Weeks after, the same thing. Eventually, I gave up. Shortly after, I forgot about it. I think my rationale was that I've never met an adult that couldn't stack things. Think about it: do you know anyone who's not put something atop something else? I must've figured he'd get it.

A few weeks ago, when cleaning out the garage, I turned around to find my son stacking empty paint cans as high as his little body...then climbing on top of a chair to stack them higher. Stacking, with ingenuity to boot. Where's the stupid survey now?


And, today I got out of the shower to find him in his room, having dragged the spare doggie bowls from the laundry room into his room, to create this tower. I would consider this stacking, wouldn't you? I just think it's so funny that he suddenly, out of the blue decided: "hey, stacking rocks!"
So, I've decided to quit worrying about this stuff. I know kids figure out stuff in their own time and they all do alright. Okay, not really. You know I'll freak out about the next survey, or the next developmental thing I'm supposed to watch for, whatever it's supposed to be. Please God, don't let there be one for the two-year well baby visit!

1 comment:

Karen Parke said...

Rachel,
My grandson is an absolutely normal little boy.....above normal in his motor skills if you ask me! He is kind, loving, smart, and a joy to be around. Forget about these stupid surveys......just enjoy him while he is still little and his world revolves around his "mommy"