Just One of the Girls

I'm told that it's totally normal for kiddos to imitate the primary caregiver. I'd expect if we had a daughter and I was toiling away in the workforce, she'd be walking around the house pretending to shave face whiskers or scratching herself in indelicate places. But, I've got a son and Daddy goes to work everyday. So, he's stuck wanting to learn to be Mommy.

Lately, when I get out of the shower in the morning, he's eagerly waiting for me holding my lotion in anticipation for his own slathering of goop. When we try to goo him up for his nighttime ritual after his own bath, apparently we lace his baby lotion with some sort of caustic compound that melts his skin off, because it's clearly torture. Somehow though, my lotion is devine. I actually sneak off to my closet and shut the door to apply my eye and face cream for fear that he'll demand that too and at the prices I pay to try to look a bit younger, I'm not about to waste it on his baby skin. Someone still in single-digit age doesn't need Retinol-A.

He also has taken to stealing my hairbrush to style his "do." I've offered him the more mainly version of a styling implement, mainly a comb, but apparently my hot pink, paddle brush is the only thing that will do. And, standing mere inches away from my blow dryer is an unparallelled joy in his universe; meanwhile, I'm finger-combing my locks because he's squirreled away my brush for his future use.

I've never been much of a makeup kind of gal, but I fear the day he starts wanting to rouge and gloss. Daddy might kill me. He was none to pleased when I let him play with the new package of underwear I finally broke down and bought myself. Hey, the laundry fairy didn't get a chance to throw them in the basket before he got hold of them and how can I help it if he went to town. And, when he discovered Mommy's sport's bra too...let's just say that at least he didn't put that on properly.